Not long ago I was engaging in negative self talk, giving in to my saboteur and generally feeling crappy about myself.
It took years, including a journey out of a toxic relationship and so much more work I had to do to come into my own, to shine my light in the world without feeling bad about it. Without putting myself down or finding flaws in literally everything I did.
And then, over time, with a little (OK, a LOT of) grace and compassion, I embraced me.
The real me. The Rupa who has some major mojo. I forgot who she was for so damn long!
And with that magic coming back, I noticed that the women I started working with when I came back into my business this time last year — they were a mirror of who I was becoming. It was pretty freaking cool. And this not only allowed me to start acknowledging what I truly wanted because I was having these real conversations with them on what THEY really wanted but it also allowed me to see that all the women that came into my studio had many beautiful things in common as they were figuring out what they wanted out of life and business! But most importantly, what they wanted for themselves!!
So, what do women want?
Each woman I work with wants to see herself as three things. Now, of course, there are so many other things she wants to be seen as but these three seem to be somewhat of a trend in my studio.
BE A PROFESSIONAL BADASS.
Whether she is an entrepreneur or a badass lawyer, the women I meet are all in professional careers and they want to be seen as the leader in their industry. They want to show up without reservation for their clients, colleagues, family, friends. It’s so easy to talk the talk but it’s another thing to walk the walk. And I must admit, the women I get to photograph ARE doing that! They are walking the walk and helping other women (and men) do the same!
TO FEEL SENSUAL.
Owning her unique beauty and see herself as the gorgeous woman everyone else sees.
A recent client talked to me after her shoot and told me that yes, she did this for her business so she could have great headshots for her website and social media, but if she was being really honest, she secretly had the session for herself!
She wanted to show her own self that even though she may have gained a little weight, aged a bit, she was still gorgeous, she still had that spark and flare in life.
Another client mentioned to me that she had a super successful business but she wasn’t feeling “it” anymore about herself. And my answer to that was, “bring it on! I want to create a photo session for you so you can walk away feeling ALL OF THAT!” And, guess what? We did. She said to me recently that the experience allowed her to feel her femininity again and that was so what she needed.
This is the magic. And you all know that I LOVE IT!
TO OWN HER SEXY.
A while back, I asked women what it meant to them to feel and own their sexy. I loved the answers I received!
Exciting and fun to be around.
Sexy in her own eyes. Not giving AF what someone else thinks!
Learn how to flirt for her own damn self. Not about flirting with someone but just to feel good about who she is becoming.
Smile and laugh and have those fun conversations that makes someone else feel good and makes her feel just as good.
Wear the cute shoes or a sexy shade of lipstick.
Focus on her body and give it some extra love and attention.
Love her body as it is. Love it fully and know that when she does, it will love her back.
Wow! This are just some of the ways that women are owning their OWN sexy — unapologetically and fiercely! Damn, it is refreshing!
So, how do you learn to F.L.Y.?
p.s. F.L.Y. = Fiercely Love Yourself
And how do you learn what you really want?
So many ways! I’ve done this by setting non-negotiable self-care rituals that rejuvenate me every single day. I use my essential oils, eat whole, healthy foods to support my body, move when I feel like I need to (dance party in the kitchen anyone?) and take my nightly baths. These are the things that work for me.
And let’s not forget all of the mindset work I have made a choice to work on over the years. I am adding daydreaming and celebrating to my list as I get stronger. They feel counterintuitive on some days but, wow, are they necessary for expansion!
I encourage you to find the things that work for you. Is it buying yourself that super luxurious robe you’ve been eyeing? That sexy lipstick others might think is “too much”? Or maybe it just means giving yourself 20 minutes of quiet down time each day so you can journal or meditate.
The point is, there are so many ways you can F.L.Y. Find what works for you and see the transformation that takes place inside.
Oh! And by the way, have you heard about the Woman Redefined Retreat happening in Puerto Vallarta?
Talk about learning how to F.L.Y.!
It’s ON and let me tell you, I am having so much fun planning it and all the amazing things that the (four) women that attend will receive! Click here for the details.